©2006, Charlie Cheney
He was never a handsome man and now he's fat too
And he understands that his tattoo
Is bulging out in a place it wasn't meant to
But he still feels the power when he's soapy in the shower
I suppose there's a hole in my life
But I know where I'm sleeping tonight
So he drives downtown to the nightclub
A girl laughs at him like he's a dumb shlub
And says "I bet your crack shows when you bend over the tub."
And then she laughs so hard she locks her keys in the car
I suppose there's a hole in my life
But I know where I'm sleeping tonight
Two-fifteen in his driveway
He smells the bar smoke in his toupee
He fumbles with his keys and mumbles what to say
When his wife asks why he's gotten grey in his eyes